Random Life of Kellie

Today is the Day I Lost You

This isn’t my favorite day of the year. Actually, it’s one of my least favorite. Today marks the day that two amazing beings joined the angels in heaven above.

One angel, I’m not going to talk about because her story isn’t mine to tell.

The other angel is my Grandpa. Grandpa Gregorich.

Today is the day I lost you. Today is the day that you rose to the heavens.

You are my favorite person. Ever. There’s no need for past tense, because whether you’re in person or spirit, you’re always by my side. You always know when I need you most. Oh, I know when you’re near me. That cologne you always wear is very prominent. I’ll never forget it. Mesmerize from Avon. You always smelled good-even while we spent all day outside in the hog yards.

I’ll never forget our last meal together. My school was having a Thanksgiving inspired meal and all students got to invite someone to come eat with them. I didn’t even bother asking my mom, dad, or grandma. I came straight to you! (I’ll never forget how excited I was when Dad told me that you would go with me!!) I remember the day like it was yesterday. I didn’t want any of that weird food, but you had me take it so I didn’t appear rude. (You whispered in my ear that you would eat, to just take it.) We sat at our own table and we talked about the food and how it tasted. Honestly, I remember just sitting across from you and feeling like the luckiest girl in the entire world. I had you. I had the best grandpa in the entire world. Best. Day. Ever.

I still reflect back on the things we used to do together.

You would buy me candy and Mountain Dew at the feed store—you didn’t care that it was loaded with sugar. You just knew your baby girl loved it so you got it for her.

The days I came home from school and you were in the kitchen, sitting in the rocking chair. (We still have that rocking chair. Someday I will rock my children in that chair. Someday I will tell them all about their great grandpa.) I would sit on your lap and would tell you all about my day. Remember that Grandpa? You used to laugh and smile. I can still remember your beautiful laugh.

When I wanted to go farming with you and you’d carry me the entire time. You weren’t a large man and I sure wasn’t a peanut, but you never complained about carrying me. You didn’t want those sows to get close to me. You would have taken a thousand beatings then risk me walking within the sows.

Dinner at the family dinner table was always fun with you. Grandma always told me to eat all my food before I could leave (or get dessert). What she didn’t know was that you always ate my peas so I could get some yummy dessert. You were the best Grandpa. I don’t think you ever knew how much I appreciated you eating those stupid peas. (By the way, I still don’t eat peas. Ew.)

How could I forget mom and dad’s story about us? They swear it’s the day that our bond officially started. I was just a baby and was spending the night with you and Grandma. I got fussy and Grandma couldn’t get me to settle down. Then you thought you would give it a try. You held me and I stopped crying. You walked the floor with me the entire night. You put my needs before yours. You held me and took all my pain away.

 

As I married my best friend this year, I wished you were there. As I walked down the aisle with dad, I wished you were on my other side, walking with us. And you were. I know you were there with us.

Every day you’re with us.

Dad and I love to quote you while we’re working on the farm. “Throw the cows over the fence some hay” (This sentence makes no sense, but you used to always say it, so we like to say it now too!) We talk about you quite regularly. How proud you would have been of Cassie and I. How much you would have loved to see the young women we grew into.

You’d be proud of dad. He reminds me a lot of you. He’s a great grandpa to Cassie’s girls and has the same look in his eyes that you had when you looked at me. He’s a great dad too. To more than just Cassie and I.

Oh and I’m still driving that awful 3010 you made Dad buy. I hate that narrow front end. So thanks for that. 🙂

Mom is still a spitfire and loves to tell us stories of you and her playing card games until the break of dawn. And how we always knew when you came to visit because when we turned the T.V. back on we all became deaf from how loud it was. She’s the new Grandma Gregorich and living up to her title quite well. You’d be really proud of her.

I don’t know why I’m telling you all of this because I know you’re watching us and still going through life with us. I know you’re always there for the good memories and the bad. Sometimes I just wish I could have one last hug. One more minute with you.

At least, when you passed away, I was still your favorite grandchild–no one can take that from me. No one.

I love you Grandpa. Forever and always.

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